Suspense of ditch belief

Ruined by my own fear. Frayed by stress, unravelling.
This too will pass of course, don't fret M. Nothing false lasts.
So much has happened on the 'inside' lately. Glimpses of what it could be like to be without fear. Unimaginable and then it was imaginable for just a second.
More trust, closer to surrender, which made the next batch of emotional crap come to the surface and that's where I am now, in the middle of lots of crap. Fear, paranoia, stress, exhaustion.
Also, letting things fall away, little things I held onto, but such a thing can never be little and I 'miss' them, or rather, experience the empty space they left behind. All it takes is some getting used to, it's agreeable enough. I'm liking empty (well, empti-er/less crammed to the rafters).