all your eggs in one casket

I keep forgetting it's Easter. I'm an emotional wreck, going from one state of overwhelmedness to the next. Haven't felt relatively stable in quite a while.
Keep crying over nothing, small stuff. Had to turn off my phone for three days so M2 wouldn't be able to contact me, because the thought alone got me close to hysteria ("ungovernable emotional excess" - sounds about right.
Still haven't painted, haven't finished that painting of a tree. Frankly, right now everything is shit. I hate my life, it's complete crap. It's an obnoxious c*nt of a life and all I ever do is age. That's about it.
Fuck this.