Wind

Fear, fear, fear.
Forgetting this isn't forever.
What a cliché.
To go through the same cycle again and again and every single time forgetting that this too shall pass. So weird.
Still exhausted: burning eyes, unsure, unable to go for walks due to (take your pick) foot/ankle/leg/hip/back problems.
Overwhelmed by contacts with family.

Let go, let go, let go is the message I'm receiving.

Immune system has been having a hard time ever since my last visit to my mother. Throat especially.
Sleeping doesn't lessen the tiredness.

[Cat has draped itself over my legs in a ridiculous way.]

Extra nervousness over potential new neighbor.
I have forever lost my innocence in that area.

Backlash, M. This is backlash.
You know how it works, ride it out.

[Sand on her ear, claw in my leg.]

I like the wind, the motion it causes in trees and grass. The sound.

[I feel a little heartbeat on my right shin.]

The same question: how do I let go?
If you're pushing yourself to let go, you are not letting go.
I'll listen to the wind instead.
If something comes up, I'll do that.
If not, I won't do anything.

Just return to your intuition, M.
Do whatever it tells you to do.
If it's quiet, stay still.
Listen to the wind.

Be tired.
Feel fear.
Stroke the Cat.
Repeat.