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Things got unbearable here. It was too much and I felt like I was crumbling, all panic, adrenaline and flashbacks from childhood abuse and abuse from the 7 year reign of terror by the former neighbor in M2's house. I just couldn't anymore. 

Then the next day it was over. This was after I had had a talk with her. Also after the other neighbor had a talk with her. (The same neighbor who had told me "at least your new neighbors are nice/fun".)

This was also after she fought with yet another neighbor; went to see him and said that nobody liked him, which is especially nasty because he has mental health issues. Also after she was expelled from the mall after making a scene. 

But right after the most horrific weekend of aggressive loudness (I can't describe it, just can't) she was gone.

The loudness was her introducing her new boyfriend to her boyfriend and the lovely pair just sitting in the garden screaming shit at him all night.

I didn't know this at the time, I was wearing headphones all weekend.

The other neighbor informed me about it 3 days later and confirmed she was gone. GOOONEEEE. THE KAREN HAS LEFT THE NEIGHBORHOOD. 

It has been bird bliss here ever since. Haven't used the headphones downstairs anymore.

So plenty of space for everything to surface.

Been floating twice a week now, made a whole schedule for myself. Twice a week for two months, then once a week for a few months, then the recommended once every two weeks for upkeep of magnesium levels (but for me personally it's about my body relaxing).

By the time I'm out of appointments I have enough money to buy another discount pass.

The other thing that suddenly changed is the weather. It was so hot and I was suddenly completely done with sitting in the sun and the heat and could not imagine months of that heat. The next day it was cloudy and it has been cool since then, with lots of rain. Loving it.

These two instances together reminded me of the time I was completely done with regressing into blindness, I was done, couldn't take it anymore. The next day I received news that my father sold his house and wanted to pay for eye surgeries, which I didn't even know were possible.

I'd write more, but I am also very tired, especially since the first vaccination which left me with terrible headaches. The second one is in two weeks, maybe I'll contact my doctor before that time, maybe not. All measures have been lifted right in time for the Delta variant.

Of course this is all life stuff. Localized awareness stuff. But that's what it is at this moment. 

Don't have the words right now to describe what's happening 'inside' me. So this will have to do.