Processing?

I'm not in the mood for anything. Maybe I'll go take a walk or something. Feel listless and nauseous again. I was looking for something and when I went through my things it was like they were someone else's: books, objects, like I was rummaging through someone else's life. What was I doing there? I felt a little detached from everything. Who was this I? I don't know, it's like I was a stranger, a visitor in this body and wherever the body went I followed, just to see where it was going.
I try to read Spiritual Enlightenment, the damnedest thing, but it doesn't interest me anymore as it did before. Today I seem to be bored with the whole enlightenment thing. Probably part of the process, but I'm bored. What am I doing here? What a waste of time. What's not a waste of time? I don't know. What should I do? I don't care, I don't want to do anything. I'm not in the mood to do anything. I'm not even hungry, or maybe I am, but food is also not on my list of desirable things today which is kind of weird. At least with fear you feel something, or joy, or whatever's on next in today's screenplay. Pfff.. BORING!!!
Guess I'll go outside now, the sun is shining. Get me some vitamin D.

M.